Am I oblivious?

Ok, so went out this weekend to our favorite hot spot in the Meat Packing district, Club One. I'm convinced its called that because its a modern day "meat market" with the many guys and gals hawking their wares. Looking smoking hot in an outfit I stole from my (20 year old) sister's closet, I was having an awesome time. Until my cousin pointed out that I was ignoring all the guys that were trying to dance with me... Really? Are you kidding? Reallllly?!?!

I don't think I ever noticed them looking before- but despite being generally attractive, I'm not the girl that the guys flock to on the dance floor. I dance to my own beat and change it up, I can't stand a bad dancer. Really, I can't. I can appreciate an enthusiastic one but not a BAD one.

So I looked around at the pickings, slim to none - I assure you. One guy was licking his lips and winking at me like he had a nervous tic... Another wanted to toss me into a sandwich with his hygiene deficient friend. Yuck!

So, I decide to dance with this one guy (who after the steely comment of 'you're single, you better open your eyes' from the happily coupled Cousin Sandy) just wanted to hump me like Aunt Mitzy's dog. Her German sheppard Great Dane mix- dog. And with all the drunk yelling in my ear and showering me with his liquor breath...! But what set him in the absolute HELL NO column was his idiot comment of..." You're done with school, you live alone and work in the city... And you're not married? What's wrong with you? I gotta ask up front."

I'm sure he thought he was being witty. I, however, wanted to pimp-slap and then BITCH-slap him and say - Are you F-ing KIDDING Meeeee!!! Bastardo, get outta my face!

To say the pickings are slim out here is not an understatement. After I turned away in disgust, I thought is this all there is out here?? This is NY!! Where does a nice girl meet a nice man these days... on street corners crossing old ladies, at church bake sales, darning socks for the homeless?

I'm taking referrals...